Dear Ms. Quan,
Her name was Jean and in the next 48 hours her life would change forever. I met 35 year old Jean in Lusaka, Zambia, a mother of three and in the late stages of AIDS. when well enough, Jean spends her time making paper mache articles to sell to raise moneyf or provisions to help other HIV postive people who are home bound, destitute and/or in need of medical care.

In order to be most effective in her work Jean decided that she needed to be public with HIV status---a decision that caused herto be rejected by her church, her family, and the other neighbors she once thought were friends.

Her husband had been unfaithful many times, even bringing lovers into her home. When she protested, he beather. He died some years ago, leaving her HIV postive, with three small children whose parents have died of AIDS.

she wanted to take us to some of the people that she frequently visits who were very ill with AIDS. We loaded up the car with vegatables for those we would visit. Jean usually walks, carrying what she can to help.

For two days we traveled together-our hearts being wrenched over and over as we visited those that Jean visits- one so ill from AIDS-related pneumonia taht she could barely speak. Her little seven-year-old son, her caregiver, stood quietly by, grief and terror in his eyes.

We visited a grandma with leprosy and HIV who had buried her daughter two days before and was left with her seven children--wondering as we did, what would become of them when she died.

It was hard to stop crying. The feelings of helplessness were overwhelming. Jean cried at each bedside.

We prayed with each one but I sensed from the first day that Jean was strugglign spiritually. Nancy Clark, our host missionary, Health Care Mission's Technical Director Carol Young, and I made Jean's spiritual condition a matter of prayer the first evening.

At the close of our second day together, we went to a place started by Jean and her HIV positive friends-a drop-in center for AIDS orphans- a very primitive mud and thatch place where the kids can come for food and basic education since none have money for school fees to attend school. There Jeand and her friends also give comfort and care to these precious children.

I don't know if I have ever been more moved by what I saw or more in awe of an individual that I was of Jean.

Before saying goodbye, I asked if I could have a few minutes alone with her. I said, "Jean, I have been praying in these last hours about whether I should say anyting to you, but i sinse, despite the beauty of those work you are doing, that you may be strugglign in your relationship with the Lord."

Her response was that she had been pondering just in the last few days before we came that she needed to forgive those who had hurt and rejected her and needed to make her relationship right with the Lord. Together we prayed a prayer of confession and forgiveness as she invited Jesus to be Lord of her life.

My heart is crying out to God as I write to you-what can I do? What can we do? What's going to happen to Jean's kids---and the seven children of the grandma?

I don't know if these words can in anyway convey to you what's in my heart. But I am determined that we will make a difference in the Jeans, in the grandmas, in the AIDS orphans.

Without Jesus, there really is no hope. With Jesus ther eis comfort, peac and strength. Please help us bring Jesus to the bedsides of those who are desperate, suffering alone.

Stories of these reminds me of God's grace. It is by his grace I am here every morning. It is by his grace I am healthy and alive. So many times have I taken for granted what I have. So many times have I been discontent with God's blessing. Everyone needs to hear stories like this to see the reality of the dying world that needs Jesus.

If you want to help. Dr. Jo Ann Butrin
Health Care Ministries
521 West Lynn Street. Springfield, MO 65802 Phone: (417) 866.6311