Thank you Mystery person # 10. Your comment this morning brought a smile to my face and it intrigued me quite a bit about what you said. I have a feeling that if I do know you, you would be one of my good friends and if I don't know you, we would become good friends. I don't really know if being naive and idealistic is a good thing...hehe. What would be your defintion of naive and idealistic be anyways? For the most part, I don't think I aspire to be that way. If anything at all, I want to know more and learn more. I don't think I could live being the same all the time. It's in my nature to push for growth in ALL areas of my life. That's why for some consistant, rational, organize people, I tend to frustrate them a lot because my thinking is disorganized and not concrete at times. I don't think this makes my character unstable or unreliable...just...what's the word?... erractic. Its also really weird how you described me as rare. This is the first time i have ever heard anyone describe people as that....um...it is very creative and it certainly very expressive. In the past, I've been described as many things. Among my favorite choice of words are neat, sharp, spunky, and now rare. Sorry, you can tell I like words a lot.

So yesterday, I went to church. Went to bible study and had a great class. I was so inspired by people to live for God. The best example i heard is this...we are here on earth to train for a marathon in heaven. I don't want to get to heaven and realize I wasn't in the best shape I could be. True...heaven will be a great place anyways but still there will be a second judgement according to what you have sown on earth. I don't want to look back and have nothing. I know...I know...my ambition should not be for my own glory but to honor God as best as we can on earth....yet God said "for we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, that each one may receive what is due him for the things done while in the body, whether good or bad. 2 corinthians 5:9. Having ambition isn't bad if you have the right motives and the right focused.

So much on my mind today... I was reading over my old journal entries and it was kinda cool what I wrote in these entries. I think people who read them will definately know me a lot better because I am such an open book. You know...a random thought popped into my head today. Some people do all they can to protect themselves by hiding things. What I noticed about myself is that if anyone wants to break me or hurt me, it wouldn't be hard for them at all. When i choose to share my life with you, I am inviting you to share in my happiness, in my sorrow, in love, and even criticism. I know some will say to me "ARE YOU STUPID? DONT LET PEOPLE KNOW YOU ARE VULNERABLE"!! Yea..i think i kinda am but you know what??? I have confidence that God is protecting me and that I don't have to worry about protecting myself. I have many friends and few enemies. And when there are times I do get hurt, God makes me stronger. Although some people call me passive and weak, I really don't mind that all too much. Look at Christ, from a distance you would think he is a weak man. He allowed people to mock him on the cross even though he had the power to blast them all by sending his Angels. He was a king yet he was considered lowly. He washed his diciple's feet. That man loves us so much. He shared his life with us in the new testiment and even put himself on earth to understand how to relate to us. He made himself vulnerable!! He didn't try to protect himself all the time. He didn't try to hide from anyone...not the tax collectors, not the children, not the pharisees, or adulterous women. Maybe we can learn to put ourselves in other's life so we can become more empathetic like Christ. I love you guys.

Sappy